gnome888 wrote:I think that we couldnt travel that far without turning into pancakes. Space travel is done by dimensional travel. Supposedly people have seen spaceships disapear, dimenionally i believe. Actually i dont really know if i believe it or not, theres no proof. Star Trek/Star Wars is cool though so i see no flaws at all.
Driving isn't safe... Nor is dealing with used car dealers... Yet we do it all the time....
Space travel isn't safe... Nor is dealing with used spacecraft dealers.... Not so different, eh?
As to the pancakes...Inertial compensators fail you?
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Aramanthus wrote:Hey Lostone. How about writing that one up as a flaw! It'd be very interesting to see a party pick one up.
It is a flaw. They're basically riding a brick at high speeds that can't really steer. If they have to stop prematurely because a slow moving asteroid moves into their path, or the gravitational strength of a star changes since the last probe visited that area, they're stranded until help arrives in the form of a refueling ship. Basically the ships have enough fuel to get up to speed and enough fuel to stop when they reach their destination.
"But you can't make an omelet without ruthlessly crushing dozens of eggs beneath your steel boot and then publicly disemboweling the chickens that laid them as a warning to others." -Order of the Stick #760
The ship looks relatively new, but anyone with space lore skills would know it to be an ancient (but generally trustworthy) model that hasn't been made for centuries. If they are really good with their lore skill, they may recognize the seller as a mysterious legendary immortal who has been popping up throughout history for, well, centuries (or longer).
If the party decides to take the ship on a quick trip, they discover the truth behind the situation is that the ship is not remarkably durable and the prior owner probably wasn't immortal. They discern this when a quick FTL jaunt leaves them years or decades in the future. Basically, from the ship's perspective the FTL (an experimental hyperdrive that nobody has tried to use since) seems to work right, but due to a glitch in the system, the ship moves through the universe at a much slower rate. The longer the trip, the closer to lightspeed the true movement speed gets. Big trips could see centuries or millenia go by. Basically, go 30 light years, and it may take you a few hours of ship time, but close to 30 years went by in the universe.
GP: 16,019.8 / JP: 30 / MZP: 75 "Overlord Rikonius is the Roland Deschain of Bad Puns, he fires them off that fast" - CornholioPrime "Rik is a deep and abundant reservoir of cool..." - Yisterwald Party hydrants strive when they have a sorority backed by beige regurgitations.
Overlord Rikonius wrote:The ship looks relatively new, but anyone with space lore skills would know it to be an ancient (but generally trustworthy) model that hasn't been made for centuries. If they are really good with their lore skill, they may recognize the seller as a mysterious legendary immortal who has been popping up throughout history for, well, centuries (or longer).
If the party decides to take the ship on a quick trip, they discover the truth behind the situation is that the ship is not remarkably durable and the prior owner probably wasn't immortal. They discern this when a quick FTL jaunt leaves them years or decades in the future. Basically, from the ship's perspective the FTL (an experimental hyperdrive that nobody has tried to use since) seems to work right, but due to a glitch in the system, the ship moves through the universe at a much slower rate. The longer the trip, the closer to lightspeed the true movement speed gets. Big trips could see centuries or millenia go by. Basically, go 30 light years, and it may take you a few hours of ship time, but close to 30 years went by in the universe.
Fun with relativity....
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
The ship hides a secret...its AI is a survivor of the Human Alliance's pre-AI War infatuation with artificial intelligences...It's actually far more intelligent than it's supposed to be, and is in fact in hiding from the post AI War 'Silicon Witch Hunt'...Whether it was an AI subset of the rebelling automata or simply an independent AI that survived both assimilation and human retaliation, it's not going to allow itself to be discovered and exposed. It's survived thus far by manipulating the ship's records and sales, and it's been running a small, but lucrative, online business of sorts(running the stockmarket or some other line of work that allows it to be unseen and out of circulation for periods of time) while debating its next move...It may have a grand plan in mind or may simply be living, in effect, hand to mouth, but it fears being discovered, and my, if it feels cornered, take drastic action to protect itself...including lethal action...
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
modern art: the designer of this spacecraft was a disgruntled art student forced to become an engineer. the ship is one giant artisitic statement. it looks great, until you realise that the abstract eye sore in that irregular room in the aft is supposed to be the ships CG drive. and that half the bridge consoles are hanging from the ceiling upsidedown. and half the access tunnels on the ship open out into the most odd places (like the captain shower, or 3 stories up the wall of the recroom..) pretty much the winchester house crossed with a modern art museum.
solid state: everything on the ship was designed to be modular and easy to replace. makes repairing and modifying the hull and living spaces easy. but a nightmare when you consider anything important like lifesupport, CG drive, powerplant, and the rest are basically sealed 'black boxes' with no individual components. even minor problems require the replacement of the entire assembly. (aka "starship by IKEA")
Last edited by glitterboy2098 on Mon Aug 08, 2011 2:46 am, edited 1 time in total.
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70) Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project) * All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. * Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter. -Max Beerbohm Visit my Website
*Permanent (Annoying) Passenger---The ship seems to have a permanent passenger. somebody who, for some reason or other, cannot be readily removed from the ship(was granted perpetual mileage by the company owning the ship, is in diplomatic limbo, is a major shareholder in the ship, is really a psychic manifestation of a curse on the ship). The Permanent Passenger at FIRST appears to be innocuous, even charming, but soon begins to grate on the crew's nerves, following them around, whining and complaining about this and that, comparing the present crew negatively to past crews("But the OTHER crew let me use the captain's cabin to shower in!"), talking about their own long and convoluted medical history("See, I got this GIANT canker on my leg, see, and it started turning green and mushy..."), or pestering the crew with questions with no apparent reason("Hey, what sort of names of governments are there out there? What starships you like? How many? What sort? You like robots? What kinda robots you like? Show me more of that stuff! I wanna see more! Hey, do you support the TGE The CCW? How many people do you think support the CCW? The TGE?"(ad infinitum...)). The Permanent Passenger quickly loses his charm and becomes a dreaded presence in any ship's public space or corridor where crew members cannot quickly make an escape. For every 2d4 days of exposure to the Passenger, crew members must roll a save versus insanity or 01-50% make an attempt to stuff the Passenger out an airlock, 51-00% attempt to throw THEMSELVES out the airlock.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
modern art: the designer of this spacecraft was a disgruntled art student forced to become an engineer. the ship is one giant artisitic statement. it looks great, until you realise that the abstract eye sore in that irregular room in the aft is supposed to be the ships CG drive. and that half the bridge consoles are hanging from the ceiling upsidedown. and half the access tunnels on the ship open out into the most odd places (like the captain shower, or 3 stories up the wall of the recroom..) pretty much the winchester house crossed with a modern art museum..
I'd spec this as Engineering rolls to fix this system are at -10% to -20% depending on how awful the art is and how disgruntled the designer was.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
*Unorthodox/Uncomfortable Security Bypass---The ship's controls require a special security device to be engaged to insure that only certain people access the control systems. Rather than a simple 'lock/unlock' system, while the vessel is operating the security bypass mechanism MUST be operating concurrently. Unfortunately, due to the ergonomics of the designers' species, or simple incompetence/malice, the security device takes the form of something awkward and grossly uncomfortable; a retinal scanner headset that cuts off the user's in-cabin peripheral vision, a tongue-print reader that clamps the operator's tongue in a holder, a blood chemistry reader that consists of needles stuck through the skin, or a rectal thermometer the operator is forced to sit on while in the control seat.
Last edited by taalismn on Thu Aug 11, 2011 3:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
*A Certain Smell---Anybody spending any amount of time aboard the ship will come off smelling of certain narcotics. It may not be phsyically discernable to the character(s), but the trace is enough to trigger drug-sniffing animals and chemical detectors. Alternatively, the traces are of certain components in explosives or chemical weapons. In any event the characters will set off customs security, resulting in a take-down. Ironically, any search of the ship will turn up NO signs of the proscribed substances.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Operator's Manuel---The onboard operator's manuel(hardcopy or computer file) is a comprehensive, well-organized, thoroughly indexed document that lays the operation, maintenance, and trouble-shooting of the ship at the crew's fingertips. At least the ORIGINAL OM was laid out like that. The copy YOUR ship has was hacked by a disgruntled technician(original factory, spaceport worker, or former crewmember) and several substitutions in the database made. They LOOK authentic, but actually following the directions in any sort of emergency or repair situation will result in a slow-burn catastrophe or sudden death, such as dangerous heat/power buildup, shield failure, or the erasure of all navigational data.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
taalismn wrote:Operator's Manuel---The onboard operator's manuel(hardcopy or computer file) is a comprehensive, well-organized, thoroughly indexed document that lays the operation, maintenance, and trouble-shooting of the ship at the crew's fingertips. At least the ORIGINAL OM was laid out like that. The copy YOUR ship has was hacked by a disgruntled technician(original factory, spaceport worker, or former crewmember) and several substitutions in the database made. They LOOK authentic, but actually following the directions in any sort of emergency or repair situation will result in a slow-burn catastrophe or sudden death, such as dangerous heat/power buildup, shield failure, or the erasure of all navigational data.
or conversely, the manual is ultra detailed on how to operate and repair the ship..and the ships computer will reject anything not in the manual. annoying in the best of times...but potential fatal since the manual doesn't cover every little thing that could occur.
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70) Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project) * All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. * Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter. -Max Beerbohm Visit my Website
taalismn wrote:Operator's Manuel---The onboard operator's manuel(hardcopy or computer file) is a comprehensive, well-organized, thoroughly indexed document that lays the operation, maintenance, and trouble-shooting of the ship at the crew's fingertips. At least the ORIGINAL OM was laid out like that. The copy YOUR ship has was hacked by a disgruntled technician(original factory, spaceport worker, or former crewmember) and several substitutions in the database made. They LOOK authentic, but actually following the directions in any sort of emergency or repair situation will result in a slow-burn catastrophe or sudden death, such as dangerous heat/power buildup, shield failure, or the erasure of all navigational data.
or conversely, the manual is ultra detailed on how to operate and repair the ship..and the ships computer will reject anything not in the manual. annoying in the best of times...but potential fatal since the manual doesn't cover every little thing that could occur.
"Whattya mean, I didn't replace the O-ring with a Model-325-61-61 B-series formula-seventeen treated polymer ring, ah....'made on a Tuesday by blind virgins, of a full moons conjunction, with a south-easterly wind prevailing'?!"
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
ROFLMAO!!!! Those were a couple of great ones. I need to gather these together. And then try and assemble a table with them in there. Please keep them coming.
"Your Grace," she said, "I have only one question. Do you wish this man crippled or dead?"
"My Lady," the protector of Grayson told his Champion, "I do not wish him to leave this chamber alive."
Body horror - the ships interior was designed by a biotechnology race that didn't understand that most races find living within giant organs to be disturbing. the walls of each room pulsate with muscle contractions and circulating bodily fluids. doors are sphincters, rapid transit tubes are muscular passages that swallow you up and push you along. don't even ask about the toilets.. just living in the ship has a HF of 12, and actually using the ships systems has a HF of 14 or higher. (reduce by half after long exposure...)
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70) Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project) * All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. * Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter. -Max Beerbohm Visit my Website
Body horror - the ships interior was designed by a biotechnology race that didn't understand that most races find living within giant organs to be disturbing. the walls of each room pulsate with muscle contractions and circulating bodily fluids. doors are sphincters, rapid transit tubes are muscular passages that swallow you up and push you along. don't even ask about the toilets.. just living in the ship has a HF of 12, and actually using the ships systems has a HF of 14 or higher. (reduce by half after long exposure...)
Line from an episode of 'Space: Above and Beyond": "I'm not sure, but I think I'm grabbing this ship's prostate!"
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Vain A.I.---The ship's self-repair AI has been programmed to keep the ship looking its best(or else has developed the psychosis that it isn't pretty enough), resulting in the ship constantly and fanatically cleaning itself, stowing any gear that is messing up its interior appearance(often without telling the crew where stuff is being placed), burning or spacing anything 'filthy'(like kiss your well-worn jacket or that invaluable ancient parchment goodbye, laying wax down on the floors so thick they may as well be laminated in frictionless acrylic(-4 t Maintain Balance). Externally, the ship's put down so many coats of paint and sealant that anybody returning to the ship after time offship is going to have trouble finding the hatches. The ship will also fight any action that could potentially scratch or mar its pristine appearance(-10% to control/pilot rolls).
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Grammar Nazi Circuit Disabled---The shipboard computer's text display function is crippled by a misprogrammed online dictionary and grammar function, resulting in baad spelyng, poor punctuation; and Errant cApITALIZATion. This can be amusing, but can also lead to problems, especially when the crew can't take the time to properly parse the text to figure out what the readouts are really saying. Characters might want to make a Literacy roll at -5% to -10%, and use an Action Per Melee to figure out what the readout REALLY means. "Fire. Cannons Disabled" and 'Fire Cannons Disabled" can mean two different things when one could refer to a weapons systems malfunction and the other to a problem with the fire suppression system.
Last edited by taalismn on Tue Sep 20, 2011 12:51 am, edited 1 time in total.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Nutso-Powered Ship: This ship doesn't work properly unless at least ONE member of the officer core/command staff is certifiably bug-house insane. The downside to this? The ship treats their orders as coming from God, taking precedance over any one elses. The upside? The ship frequently does things that should break the laws of physics/common sense (Hiding in their own shadow, able to load and fire large missles out of a laser cannon, deploying a mast with sails to go faster, pulling a 180 at max speed without changing vector like a yo-yo, opening both sets of airlock doors without depressurizing, etc), but only when the loony either orders it or physically performs the task.
Stress Testing Ship: This ship has a hidden agenda, it was actually built by or converted by an alien intelligence trying to figure out the amusing little beings in this dimension. The ship has dozens (perhaps hundreds) of sensors, recording devices, manipulative appendiges, robot drones, and projectors of all sorts, to play with its 'masters'. Some members of the crew are tested to the breaking point with equipment breaking down for no reason, things dissapearing into thin air, lights turning off and on, lights in the wrong spectrum, noises just on the edge of the victims range of hearing, powerful but elusive scents that come and go, clothes that are always just a bit clammy. They are essentially tortured just to the edge of breaking, without (hopefully) ever quite going over the edge. Other members have the opposite effects inflicted upon them. Things rarely break down, when they do its an easy fix, their property is always right where they left it, their rooms are places of perfect lighting/odor/sound/temp/humidity. These people seem to live a charmed life. They can't see what the fuss their comrades are making about things, this is the best ship ever!
Ship of Kings: This ship has a bug in its command structure, in that it can only be commanded by royalty and nobility. The higher your social standing, the higher your rank in the ships point-of-view. Others who attempt to give orders/perform maintenance/do anything without the say-so of a noble-person will ger reported and have the security-bots sicced on them. Oh, and the ship has the ability to disable any and all wepaons and armor inside its shell. Ships with this flaw need to stay the heck away from escaped noble loonies who are trying to win back the thrones, and anybody with a credible claim to nobility. Depending on how far gone this ship is, it might only reiquire people to refer to each other by their title, their FULL titles and names, or dress in period costuems and use period speach, or other eccentricities. The upside to this, is that all handling is done at +3 to dodge/strike and +5% to piloting rolls when done by a royal or nobleman.
You'd be suprised at what the G.M. will allow with a little blackmail and bribery...
"Jack! You've debauched my sloth!" - Steven Matrin
"Artillery is the King of the Battlefield, Infantry is the Queen; and everybody knows what the King does to the Queen."- Stuart, from StarDestroyer.net
Impregnation Fixation---The ship's AI basically thinks it's a DNA seed package meant to spread its genes to other worlds, It thus seeks to 'impregnate' suitable host planets by ramming itself as deeply within the crust as possible. Fortunately, the crew should have sufficient warning every time the AI gets the 'urge' (it will signal its intentions by announcing it is 'ready to commence the next phase of the great cycle of life' or by playing romantic music and intoning like Barry White) to either disconnect the computer, wrest control out of the terminal approach(at -20% to Piloting rolls) or abandon ship. Neutering the computer is also possible with a complete wipe and re-installation, but has a 25% chance of setting up some other computer-related problem.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
zedjagder wrote:Multiple A.I.s, every system on the ship (engines, navigation, sensors, life-support, tactical systems, etc...) is run by a seperate A.I.. And, they don't get along with eachother (and maybe the crew, G.M.s choice). So, for example; when the captian orders the helm to lay-in a course for a particular destination...the nav computer may refuse to share the course route with the engine control computer and the crew, thus forcing the ship to "fly blind".
Kind of reminds me of the Heterodyne Castle in Girl genius, after an attack it's central AI fragmented so various pieces of the castle were operating independently and often at cross purposes (one part would dragoon someone for repairs only for another part to kill them before they could get to the particular part that was damaged to repair it).
Fair warning: I consider being called a munchkin a highly offensive slur and do report people when they err in doing so.
'Reality is very disappointing.' - Jonathan Switcher from Mannequin
It's 'canon', not 'cannon'. A cannon is a big gun like on pirate ships, canon is what you mean when referring to something as being contained within one of the books such as how many dice to roll for a stat.
Now that is an interesting flaw. Each of the various departments on the ship having an AI. And the ship with no over riding AI to control the others. Now that would be controlled chaos. Especially if they couldn't get along. Excellent! Please keep them coming.
"Your Grace," she said, "I have only one question. Do you wish this man crippled or dead?"
"My Lady," the protector of Grayson told his Champion, "I do not wish him to leave this chamber alive."
zedjagder wrote:Multiple A.I.s, every system on the ship (engines, navigation, sensors, life-support, tactical systems, etc...) is run by a seperate A.I.. And, they don't get along with eachother (and maybe the crew, G.M.s choice). So, for example; when the captian orders the helm to lay-in a course for a particular destination...the nav computer may refuse to share the course route with the engine control computer and the crew, thus forcing the ship to "fly blind".
Reminds me of a flying heap of junk from a galaxy far-far away...
Adios KLM
But still, one of the most basic rules for survival on any planet is never to upset someone wearing black leather - This is why protesters against the wearing of animal skins by humans unaccountably fail to throw their paint over Hell's Angels.
- Terry Prachett
Small font: use ctrl+c and copy it, so you can read. But since it is in small fonts, it is not important. I am not a NE salesperson.
Could be worse....your A.I.-equipped planet-destroying stellar nuclear fusion demolition device could refuse to detach from your starship, requiring tense negotiations before it decides to go off. (Dark Star; one of the darker 'space opera' movies ever made).
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
LOL That was a dark, but it was funny. Now if they only had a robot who could bend girders. And maybe a one eyed alien, a delivery boy and you know the rest.
How about a ship that is completely modular. Where with a few modifications could allow it to do anything. And practically travel anywhere. Just not very well.
"Your Grace," she said, "I have only one question. Do you wish this man crippled or dead?"
"My Lady," the protector of Grayson told his Champion, "I do not wish him to leave this chamber alive."
taalismn wrote:Could be worse....your A.I.-equipped planet-destroying stellar nuclear fusion demolition device could refuse to detach from your starship, requiring tense negotiations before it decides to go off. (Dark Star; one of the darker 'space opera' movies ever made).
Well there WAS that AI-equipped WMD space bomb that the Voyager crew had the misfortune of becoming hostage of after they picked it up and didn't realize what they were getting into. They had a lot of negotiating going on before they talked it out of using them to complete its mission. Schlock Mercenary gets around that problem by having the AI be 'dumb' enough that it actually loves the idea of completing its job and often you'll see them thinking to themselves how they look forward to it and in one storyarc a set of conversion bombs were set with three different explosion conditions and each one was arguing if something had met its condition with the one going 'hey we're going off on so many seconds anyway why rush?'.
Fair warning: I consider being called a munchkin a highly offensive slur and do report people when they err in doing so.
'Reality is very disappointing.' - Jonathan Switcher from Mannequin
It's 'canon', not 'cannon'. A cannon is a big gun like on pirate ships, canon is what you mean when referring to something as being contained within one of the books such as how many dice to roll for a stat.
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70) Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project) * All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. * Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter. -Max Beerbohm Visit my Website
(blinks)Well....that's one way of looking at a Resurrection Ship...though I'm pretty sure Six would beg to differ with you....
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
zedjagder wrote:Has anyone here considered split personality...as far as the ships A.I. is concerned. The possibilities may be endless.
I'm sorry Dave, I can't let you do that.
Hey, Dave aint here man!
OR A starship A.I. suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder could provide countless hours of fun!
IFF Failure---Your ship's automated security system with biometric ID scanner has a defective memory; there's a 20% chance every time the system is activated(the ship locked behind you and the system armed) of the system 'forgetting' who you are, and refusing to grant you access, even with a retinal scan, fingerprints, and DNA sample. Worse yet, there's a 25% chance of the lethal force component of the security system then taking exception to the attempted 'break in' and opening up on you.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
taalismn wrote:[ IFF Failure---Your ship's automated security system with biometric ID scanner has a defective memory; there's a 20% chance every time the system is activated(the ship locked behind you and the system armed) of the system 'forgetting' who you are, and refusing to grant you access, even with a retinal scan, fingerprints, and DNA sample. Worse yet, there's a 25% chance of the lethal force component of the security system then taking exception to the attempted 'break in' and opening up on you.
Nice, I like this line of thinking!
Not recommended if your ship regards 1d4x1000 MD per blast weaponry as 'anti-personnel measures', and has the means to bring those heavy weapons to bear on small targets.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Orthodontical Failure: This ship is cursed, literally. The spell is woven into the fabric of the ship, meaning there is no fix short of dismantling and completely rebuilding the vessel (there is also a 19+1d6% percent chance of spreading this curse to vessels using parts taken from this conveyance). Everybody who is not an officer, charter member, or owner of the ship (or stock in the company that owns the ship) suffers from terrible oral hygene, enforced upon them by the curse. No matter how much mouthwash they use, they have horrible hallitosis; no matter how often they brush, they have terrible plaque; even if they use an entire dispenser of floss every day, they will still get fragments and junk stuck in their teeth; cracks, chips, impacted teeth, infected roots, anything that can go wrong, does. This affliction takes effect as soon as the poor S.O.B. boards the vessel, and ends once they leave; 'ends' is defined as 'While the problem no longer gets worse and can actually be worked upon and cured now, any previously existing problem still exists and will take a normal amount of time to fix.'
Geriatric Advancement: The same as above, only applying to the luckless individuals BONES, effectively forcing arthritis, osteoperosis, gout, and alzheimers on them (this version slowly fades in upon arrival and just as slowely out after leaving).
Energy Sink: The ship has an odd variant on vampiric tendancies, it feeds on energy instead of the blood or life-force of others. This usually is limited to things like draining the odd E-Clip left unatended or battery in the store-room, but in heavy combat or intense situations, the ship might limit or shut off power to things like lights, heat/AC, gravity, etc. If the ship is severely damaged, it might try and drain the fuel cells of the other vehicles in it (shuttles, fighters, ground transport, etc) or cyborgs and other high-powered energy sources (APS energy and EE style beings, etc) against their will. Treat all such attempts on living beings as a psychic attack at -3 to save, because the ship is so much BIGGER, powerful, and meaner than they are. The plus side to this is that the ship takes 10% less damage from ALL forms of non-kinetic energy attacks, and will adapt is sheild and armor to each vessels attacks, with each successive attack dealing 5% less (80% reduction cap). Most of its normal 'meals' are actually garnered through simply bathing in the stellar radiation it encounters during its voyages, and makes the vessel virtually IMMUNE to external radiation sources and attacks (only .0000000000000002% of any radiation makes it through the hull).
Faulty Safety Gear: Could be sabotauge, might be an accident, or even just plain poor design, but there is something about this vessel and its safety equipment/design that is just plain WRONG. Ladders and stairs coated in a hyper-slick coating that will cause legs to go flying around at odd angles, safety straps/seat belts that are actualy highly elastic, explosive bolts designed to remove portions of the vessel for things like ejection seats and emergency blastdoors/airlocks that go off at slightly more than room temperature (or worse, DON'T go off when their supposed to), scalpels and other surgery tools are kept deliberatly dull, fire fighting equipment that have the hoses/extinguishers in hard to reach areas or WAY to short/small to be of any resonable use. It is strongely recommended to any who travel in her that they inspect and replace/repair all of her safety gear before somebody gets hurt or killed by whats supposed to save them.
You'd be suprised at what the G.M. will allow with a little blackmail and bribery...
"Jack! You've debauched my sloth!" - Steven Matrin
"Artillery is the King of the Battlefield, Infantry is the Queen; and everybody knows what the King does to the Queen."- Stuart, from StarDestroyer.net
Oh god....the tragicomic possibilities of BUNGEEE SEATBELTS.... "Aren't the bug smears supposed to be on the OUTSIDE of the windshield?"
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"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
drama circuts: the ship's creators were big fans of overblown acting and gestures, and their procedures are hardwired into the ships control systems. the ship will literally not work unlesss the crew performs in a suitably dramatic fashion. for example, instead of merely pushing the firing button for the ships weapons, the captain would have to stand, point at the enemy, and bellow "FIRE! CANNONS!" while the gunner slams his hand onto a breakable plate over the fire button.. launching fighters might require the flight oficer asking permission for launh, followed by "FIGHTERS! ARE! GO!" and slamming their hand down on a breakable plate over the fire button... about half the controls would need to have their break plates replaced between each (and every) use, with the ship having ot carry tons of these glass barrier plates around. and the crew is likely to shout themselves hoarse just navigating peacefully through a starcluster. not to mention the near fatal results of stagefright!
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70) Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project) * All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. * Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter. -Max Beerbohm Visit my Website
glitterboy2098 wrote:drama circuts: the ship's creators were big fans of overblown acting and gestures, and their procedures are hardwired into the ships control systems. the ship will literally not work unlesss the crew performs in a suitably dramatic fashion. for example, instead of merely pushing the firing button for the ships weapons, the captain would have to stand, point at the enemy, and bellow "FIRE! CANNONS!" while the gunner slams his hand onto a breakable plate over the fire button.. launching fighters might require the flight oficer asking permission for launh, followed by "FIGHTERS! ARE! GO!" and slamming their hand down on a breakable plate over the fire button... about half the controls would need to have their break plates replaced between each (and every) use, with the ship having ot carry tons of these glass barrier plates around. and the crew is likely to shout themselves hoarse just navigating peacefully through a starcluster. not to mention the near fatal results of stagefright!
There must also be a Designated Flung Officer...somebody who gets thrown across the bridge when the ship is hit or undertakes violent manuevers. Without a proper Flung Officer, the ship must randomly designate a bridge officer or engineer to have an inexplicable Console Overload Explosion.
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"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
zedjagder wrote:Flatulence After 1D100 hours of operation (continual or accumulative G.M.s descression) the drive system has an explosive release of fuel (caused by a programing glitch or faulty drive system component. G.M.s choice) causing the ship to be suddenly be propelled at maximum velocity in the direction it is facing. After this burst of sudden acceleration the drive system shuts down for 4D6 hours (so it can cool off, recharge, whatever the case may be) causing the ship to travel at maximum velocity for the entire time unless acted upon by the gravity of some stellar object(planet, moon, sufficently large enough astroid, blackhole, etc...).
"I resent our Fleet callsign being 'Farting Mary' or 'The Lead Glider'! And I also demand, as Captain of a Fleet BATTLESHIP, that my vessel get PROPER maintenance and overhaul work performed in a timely manner, with priority to repairing an OBVIOUSLY faulty drive system"
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"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
zedjagder wrote:MAYDAY! MAYDAY! This is the CCWSS Crusader, Our ship is busting ass all over the quaderent! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!
"How are we going to find them to rescue them? They didn't transmit coordinates!" "Follow the nebulae!" "Ah....must we?"
(Curiously enough, when astronauts coming back in from spacewalks were asked to describe how space smelled, they reported it 'smelled burnt', as a result of carbon molecules deposited on their suits, the molecules coming loose when in an atmosphere...)
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"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Costume Security---The ship incorporates a bizarre optical security system that assigns particular uniforms to certain crew positions; if the crewman's dress does not meet the correct description in its files, it will refuse to enable that workstation/set of controls. The mild form of this is that crewmen must adhere to a strict(often military) dress code---no 'out of uniform', though the ship's systems are programmed to provide leeway for battle wear-and-tear to clothing. The extreme form of this is anything from a Carmen Miranda outfit complete with fresh fruit, to nudity and bodypaint patterns. Worst case form is the dress code changes regularly and apparently randomly, requiring crewmembers to keep a complete and extensive wardrobe nearby and ready, and become quick-change artists.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Smell-o-Rama--Your (Golgan) ship's deluxe entertainment system is Golgan-made to appeal to all the primary senses, and is thus calibrated to Golgan sensory parameters. Golgan multi-media is truly multi-sensory, with visual, audio, and aromatic components. Unfortunately, while the ship has a LARGE enetrtainment library, it's all formatted for Golgans, with soundtracks that sound like fingernails on chalkboards, and make canines howl, visuals that induce blindness, and smell-o-vision that chainsaws your sinuses. Even if the new operators are able to substitute their own programs for the Golgan selections, the system will attempt to 'interpret' the new media into Golgan-friendly standards, making that blockbuster film you wanted to watch into a literal stinker. Be grateful the last owners didn't spring for the tactile stimuli model.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"
Ships layout doesn't match blueprints. Takes 2D4 times longer to get anywhere, until the ships layout can be mapped.
Storage areas are too small for what they are suppose to hold or smaller than the plans say. The 100x100x50ft cargo bay is half that size. The food storage room that's met to hold 45 days of food for 5, is 8x8x8ft.
taalismn wrote:Operator's Manuel---The onboard operator's manuel(hardcopy or computer file) is a comprehensive, well-organized, thoroughly indexed document that lays the operation, maintenance, and trouble-shooting of the ship at the crew's fingertips. At least the ORIGINAL OM was laid out like that. The copy YOUR ship has was hacked by a disgruntled technician(original factory, spaceport worker, or former crewmember) and several substitutions in the database made. They LOOK authentic, but actually following the directions in any sort of emergency or repair situation will result in a slow-burn catastrophe or sudden death, such as dangerous heat/power buildup, shield failure, or the erasure of all navigational data.
or conversely, the manual is ultra detailed on how to operate and repair the ship..and the ships computer will reject anything not in the manual. annoying in the best of times...but potential fatal since the manual doesn't cover every little thing that could occur.
"Whattya mean, I didn't replace the O-ring with a Model-325-61-61 B-series formula-seventeen treated polymer ring, ah....'made on a Tuesday by blind virgins, of a full moons conjunction, with a south-easterly wind prevailing'?!"
OR, the manual is perfect, this manual is so PERFECT a blind chimp and a goldfish could fly/fix/ect the ship, however.... it's the WRONG MANUAL, it looks like the manual for your ship but it's not, everything the manual says to do is just a little off when it applies to your ship. For example, power cable #234B is for the hot water setting in the captains shower not the lights in his bathroom. Strangely the correct manual for your ship can never be found.
