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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 4:18 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
so I thought that I had posted this earlier today. Apparently, I was wrong. So here goes!

I have two after the bomb characters, both with the healer apprenticeship. Each practices his own style of Medicine & supplies his patients and customers with a variety of homemade concoctions


Pc 1 "Dr. Hop" (an exotic species of frog) is a Wild West styled gunslinging doctor who is famous for his assortment of tonics, elixirs, and snake oils.

Pc 2 "R.O.U.S. Humperdink" (a BIG brown rat) is a druid styled herbalist and practitioner of wilderness / alternative medicine. He is known for his potions ,teas, and medicinal salves.

Both Dr.'s produce wondrous (a dubious claim) products that to the uneducated border on magical (it is amazing what a good sales pitch and some flashy showmanship will do).None of which have any true magical properties. At the most, they have some superstitious / folklore elements.

Now I am not a chemist or an herbalist. So I would like to see your submissions for the wares these doctors ply to their patients and customers. there doesn't have to be any actual science behind the submission as long as it is cool. Also, not everything has to be a curative product either. Concoctions can be poisonous, weaponized, or have some other practical or impractical use.

please note, that both of these characters are trained healers. They just go about their job in completely different styles.

Doctor Hop definitely practices a more modern style of medicine.

Whereas Rous gets the job done with what may seem like medieval means. in reality, his village doesn't have the resources or capability for him to practice anything more modern then what he does despite him being fully trained to practice modern medicine with modern equipment. They like their druidic styled herbalist healer so that is the role/niche he has settled into.

All of that to say this, the majority of what you submit should actually do the job it claims to regardless of how far fetched it may seem.

Please use the following format for your submissions.
Name
Tagline/slogan
Ingredients
How it is prepared. Used and applied.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!)
Duration
Side effects (if any)
Duration
Suggested retail/barter price


example
Dr Hops Hellcat wart remover.
Cures warts carbuncles and dry scaly skin. Not for use by those of a reptilian or amphibian heritage.
Ingredients black cat extract, fresh dug grave dirt, cactus water.
Directions combine ingredients in a pot at midnight in the light of a full moon. Simmer until a thick paste is formed. Keep sealed and buried until the night of a new moon. Apply at the darkest hour. Do not remove! Let dry and flake off. Ailments cured when all paste has fallen off of the affected area.
Effects works as advertised!
Duration: 1 d 6 months
Side effects smells like a fresh dug grave and sleepwalks for 3 D 4 nights.
barter price 1 healthy live chicken.
Monetary price two bits


Sent from my Galaxy s3. Sorry for any errors

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


Last edited by The Oh So Amazing Nate on Tue Nov 11, 2014 5:14 am, edited 2 times in total.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 4:35 am
  

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Palladin

Joined: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:11 am
Posts: 8438
Location: Northern Gun
Comment: 24 was the start... We are Legion.
Name: Hop Along's "Go Faster Powder"
Tagline/slogan: Faster than a Jackrabbit on a date!
Ingredients: Dried and powdered extract of the coca plant.
How it is prepared. Used and applied: (I'm not actually going to google how cocaine is made, but.. you know. You can if you want. I'm on enough governmental watch lists): Applied in powder form, snorted.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): Produces a sense of euphoria and elation. A grand feeling that you can do anything and does indeed wake you up and at least makes you think you're more alert and faster!
Duration: A little while. Not too terribly long.
Side effects (if any): Well... rumor has it that it's highly addictive.
Suggested retail/barter price: Varys with location. From dirt cheep to exorbitantly expensive. Especially for addicts.

(( For the record. this may seem humorous or even 'dark' but it --was-- advertized and prescribed by real doctors for years as a medical cural. And not 100s and 100s of years ago but in the past 50 to 75.))

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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 5:08 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
Dried and powdered coca extract. . that was going to be one of the ingredients for my patented "**** and Vinegar" tonic. I will have to use a different stimulant now.

Nice first submission. Major nitpicks: it is only one ingredient not a combination of things. also, it is a real thing and not some fanciful creation. Thanks for participating.!

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 5:21 am
  

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Palladin

Joined: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:11 am
Posts: 8438
Location: Northern Gun
Comment: 24 was the start... We are Legion.
The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Dried and powdered coca extract. . that was going to be one of the ingredients for my patented "**** and Vinegar" tonic. I will have to use a different stimulant now.

Nice first submission. Major nitpicks: it is only one ingredient not a combination of things. also, it is a real thing and not some fanciful creation. Thanks for participating.!


Well, again, my actual knowledge of the make up of such a thing is limited, but it's my understanding you have to cut it with something, or it blows up the person's heart, so it'd have some thing that the plant extract was cut with? So that can be added in. I just personally know little about it other than I don't want it myself.

You said it didn't 'have' to have scientific background, not that it 'couldn't.' :) This item actually 'works', it's just you know..... kinda bad for you in the long run. Real life doctors really did prescribe it for years as a cure all, and there were adds for it in major magazines and news papers and all. lol

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Lt. Nyota Uhura: I'm impressed. For a moment there, I thought you were just a dumb hick who only has sex with farm animals.

James Tiberius Kirk: Well, not _only_...


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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 5:25 am
  

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Palladin

Joined: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:11 am
Posts: 8438
Location: Northern Gun
Comment: 24 was the start... We are Legion.
Name: Milk of the Poppy
Tagline/slogan: Kills Pain, and lets you sleep like the dead.
Ingredients: Extract of the Poppy, mixed with milk
How it is prepared. Used and applied: The essence of the Poppy is extracted. Mixed with milk to make more palatable.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): Produces euphoria, reduces pain, and in slightly more quantity, produces slumberous effect.
Duration: Dependent on dosage, typically a few hours to a night.
Side effects (if any): Can become addictive, requiring more and more to gt the same effects. Withdraw is a female dog.
Duration: Quite a while, and severe
Suggested retail/barter price: Steep. Can be used both in medical application, as well as recreational. Allows for surgery and what not out side of major tech centers when used in sufficent quantities as a sedative/anesthesia

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Lt. Nyota Uhura: I'm impressed. For a moment there, I thought you were just a dumb hick who only has sex with farm animals.

James Tiberius Kirk: Well, not _only_...


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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 6:14 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
Submitted by P. Haworth irl

Sebastian Romanoff's miracle hair grower
Slogan, "Hare in hours"
Ingredients: Hair of the Gorilla (at l least 5 strands), 1 ounce of pleasure Bunny sweat. Water from a hot spring at least 8 ounces. 1 dozen egg whites.
Directions: Mix ingredients together over heat until thick and warm throughout. Add sweat at last minute.
Apply to desired areas after a hot shower. Let dry on skin.
Effects: Grows thick hair where desired.
Duration: Lasts 1d4 months.
Side effects: Grows a fine hair Every where else! Increased libido. Slight elongation of the upper ears and protrusion of the incisors
Duration: Lasts 1 months
Cost: 10 bucks (do you know what it takes to collect an oz of Pleasure Bunny sweat?!) or 2 strong horses

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


Last edited by The Oh So Amazing Nate on Sat Nov 15, 2014 12:14 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 4:51 pm
  

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Location: Reno, Nevada
This may be useful for you.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 7:57 pm
  

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHboMLW-Zn0

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Unread postPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 2:17 am
  

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Palladin

Joined: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:11 am
Posts: 8438
Location: Northern Gun
Comment: 24 was the start... We are Legion.
Name: Fur-B-Gone!
Tagline/slogan: For that freshly shaved or waxed feel with none of the fuss or muss! For the Mutant animal that wishes smooth skin instead of a furry pelt, be it for yourself, or your boyfriend or girlfriend. Fur-B-Gone will remove that pesky fur, and leave you smooooothe to the touch!
Ingredients: Papaya powder- ¼ tablespoon OR Papaya paste- 1 tablespoon
Turmeric powder- ¼ tablespoon
Gram flour- ¼ tablespoon
Aloe vera gel- 4 tablespoons
Mustard oil- 2 tablespoons
Essential oil (optional- lavender or any other)- 2 drops
How it is prepared. Used and applied:
Combine all the ingredients and mix well to get a thick paste.
Apply this paste to your body part in opposite direction of hair growth.
Leave it for 15-20 minutes or till it dries off.
Take a clean cloth and rub in the opposite direction of hair growth.
When all of the paste has been removed in this way, wash off with water and pat dry.
Take a few drops of olive oil, moisturizer or baby oil and massage the skin with this.
Repeat this thrice a week and continue for at least 3 months.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): It actually works.
Duration: For a while, until hair grows back.
Side effects (if any): You smell like Papaya and Turmeric
Duration: until the smell washes off.
Suggested retail/barter price: Depends on the avability of Papaya and Turmeric.

_________________
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Lt. Nyota Uhura: I'm impressed. For a moment there, I thought you were just a dumb hick who only has sex with farm animals.

James Tiberius Kirk: Well, not _only_...


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Unread postPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 11:06 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
This was one of the first concoctions that bounced around in my head when I came up with the idea to ask for everyone's help. The general idea of what I want it to do is here, but it could used polishing. I'm open to peer review. Thanks.

Name: Devil's Sap (a product of ROUS Humperdink)
"Truthfully it will ward off Allosauroids and cause any being it touches to beg for death"
Ingredients: The dried, powdered placental membrane of 10 Carolina Reaper Peppers, 16 oz/1 pint of the oily sap from a Poison: Oak, Ivy, or Sumac plant, 2 oz of cocklebur seeds. Fresh pine resin.
Directions: Dissolve the powdered Carolina Reaper in the Poison Ivy sap. Soak the cocklebur seeds in the mixture until well saturated. Gradually stir in Pine Resin until the mixture thickens into a thin syrup (sticky, but not so thick that it won't spread easily)
Uses/Application: When used as a deterrent: Apply to fences/barriers with a brush. Reapply if treated area completely dries out or is washed away by prolonged heavy rains (1d6 days of solid raining with a total accumulation of at least 3 inches). When used as a weapon: Store in a tightly sealed breakable container or gourd. Throw at target, aiming for exposed areas (especially the face or other "soft" locations"
Effects: "It burns like the devil hisself" The sap and cockleburs make the concoction stick to skin/fur/clothing. When victim attempts to wipe/rub it off, the poison oils are spread and the burs scratch the skin causing further irritation. The capsicum from the peppers just makes everything worse. Treat as severe acid burn. No saving throw, only dodge. The smell is extremely noxious and burns the sinuses (non lethal gas damage/save). 2x the effect for adv. smell. Will cause blindness if gotten in eyes and not immediately treated (use rules for pepper spray/mace but reacts 3x faster)
Duration: Until substance is completely diluted/washed off by running water (use cold. hot water opens the pores and makes it worse) or diluted with milk (enough to fully submerge and soak the victim in).
Side effects (if any): None. The main effects are bad enough
Side effect duration: N/A
Suggested retail/barter price: Not available for purchase!!! If needed as a wildlife deterrent the price is to come out and apply it to the desired area. 30 bucks per half pint (240ml)

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 5:44 pm
  

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Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
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Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England
O see I'm going to have to re-stock my medical cabinet.
AND spend some time boning up on my medicinal alchemy. :D 8)

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 9:20 pm
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
Taalismn, this is not exactly what I meant when I asked you to post in this thread. Nevertheless, I'm glad to see that you're here and are taking an interest. I can't wait to see what you come up.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2014 6:34 pm
  

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Priest

Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
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Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England
The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Taalismn, this is not exactly what I meant when I asked you to post in this thread. Nevertheless, I'm glad to see that you're here and are taking an interest. I can't wait to see what you come up.



I've been known for chewing through my leash and behaving not according to plSQUIRREL!

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Fri Nov 14, 2014 12:21 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
taalismn wrote:
The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Taalismn, this is not exactly what I meant when I asked you to post in this thread. Nevertheless, I'm glad to see that you're here and are taking an interest. I can't wait to see what you come up.



I've been known for chewing through my leash and behaving not according to plSQUIRREL!


Easy there big fella. Calm down and concentrate. I know you can do this.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 15, 2014 12:10 pm
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
Name: Wéixiǎo de shǎndiàn (tiny lightning) joint salve.
Slogan: Do your joints ache or creak? Do you stiffen up in the cold or when the weather is bad? Then try Weixiao de shandian joint salve. It will put a jolt in your step. Hair raising results guaranteed!
Ingredients: Made with powdered electric eel skins, owl snot, greased pig renderings, mugwort herb ashes, Prickly Ash bark, Guggal herb, and peach blossoms.
Application: Apply a small amount 1/4 teaspoon to troubled areas and massage in. Use no more than 3x per 24 hours. Wipe off excess and keep stored in a lacquered wooden box.
Effects: 1st dose. Reduces joint pain and stiffness. 2nd dose. Joints Very limber, body feels warm and energized. +1 initiative. 3rd dose. Body feels Extremely limber and energized. +2 initiative.
Duration: 1st dose lasts 1d8 hours. 2nd dose reduces duration by 1/4. 3rd dose reduces remaining duration to 1d4 melee rounds.
Side Effects: (begin at 3rd dose) Static Shock when touching another living thing or conductive object a small static electric discharge occurs. Both parties take 1 point of damage. 1-60% of dropping any hand held items.
Static Cling All hair/fur stands on end. Clothes cling, wrinkle, and become uncomfortable. Small bits of fluff, dust bunnies, and other debris will cling to the character.
4th dose: Static Discharge. 1d6 damage taken by character and any being touched. Immediately shorts out non shielded electronic devices and erases non optical media.
Static Field. Similar to static cling but more powerful. A static charge covers the characters body and crackles with movement. -1 dodge. Prowl is -5% due to crackling noise. -10% at night due to noise and small sparks as character moves.
5th dose. Effects of level 4 are now +2/+5% (eg -3 dodge). All bonuses are lost. Body feels exceptionally warm. Burning sensation at points of application (use pain penalties for minor flesh wound).
6th dose. If the character is foolish enough to apply 6x within 24 hours the affected site/joint becomes so loose/limber that it will no longer support the weight of the body part above it!! Ankles, Knee, Hips buckle and character cannot stand on that body part. Wrists, Eblows, Shoulders become slack and hang limp/will not flex. If applied to the neck or back, the head/torso droops forward.
Side Effect Duration: At each application starting at L3 side effects last 2x length of initial (1st dose) duration.
Suggest Cost: 50 bucks due to the rarity of the ingredients and special non-conductive container. Will consider trading for very rare items/plants/herbs 1-20% chance.



I considered using this as a general purpose lubricant/grease for non living objects that would gradually (each time hinge swung/wheel turned) would generate a static charge. Super effective/quiet operation with the risk of getting a zap! But as is it was so much work to get (close) to where I wanted I decided against non medical applications.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 12:45 am
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
All these views and PepsiJedi and myself are the only one's commenting?! What have I done to offend thee oh noble patrons of these distinguished forums?

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 8:54 pm
  

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Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
Posts: 43141
Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England
Name: Uncle Pugilista’s Percussive Sleep Ointment
Tagline/slogan: “Puts you down for the sheep count”
Ingredients: Rosewater, essence of ether, tincture of iodine
Preparation and Application: In order, add the rosewater, ether, and iodine together and allow to soak into a thin absorbant cloth. Wrap the sopping wet cloth around a brick(may substitute cobblestone or leather sap) and apply vigorously to the back of the skull of the patient. Repeat until unconsciousness is achieved.
Effects: Unconsciousness, blissful unconsciousness.
Duration: Typically 3d6x10 minutes, depending on success and vigor of application
Side effects: Occasional skull fracture, internal bleeding, dementia, concussion, and death may result with overly-vigorous application. Consult a physician or undertaker in event of these side effects.
Duration: Impairment/death may be permanent.
Suggested retail/barter price: 3 dollars a bottle(bottle typically good for 5 applications). Price may be deducted from patient’s wallet after successful application.

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 9:14 pm
  

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Explorer

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2012 9:23 am
Posts: 151
Name: Comfry Boguart's Healing Poultice.
Tagline/slogan: "Out of all the Healing Joints, in all the world... She stumbled bleeding into mine."
Ingredients: Comfry Root, Grey Moss, Milk of Dandelion, and Garlic Powder.
How it is prepared. Used and applied.: Crush Comfry Root, Grey Moss, and Garlic Powder in a small bowl. Mix into the mixture the Milk of Dandelion. Stir to create a paste. Use more Garlic and Comfry Root, to Thicken.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): Promotes Healing to an injuried area. Such as a Gun Shot, Burn, or other external injury. Do Not Consume. (Restores 3D6 H.P. or S.D.C. (or 1D4 M.D.C. per GM's call).
Duration: Full effect after 1 Minute (4 Melee Rounds), dries up and flakes off in 2 hours. Can be reused once every 4 Hours.
Side effects (if any): Smells like Garlic for 1D4 Hours after application. If ingested, save vrs Harmful Drugs, or induce vomiting for 1D6 minutes. All skills, and HtH Bonuses are at half while vomiting.
Suggested retail/barter price: 10 Credits per application, or fair trade.

_________________
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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:25 pm
  

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Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
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Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England
Brayon wrote:
Name: Comfry Boguart's Healing Poultice.
Tagline/slogan: "Out of all the Healing Joints, in all the world... She stumbled bleeding into mine.".


:D
"When I fix broken hearts, I prefer it NOT to be with my hand in somebody's chest, plugging the holes with my fingers, while using my other hand to call for the EMTs."

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 11:49 pm
  

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Champion

Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2007 1:29 am
Posts: 1774
Location: West Central region of Indiana
Ha! Apply with a brick indeed!
"Of all the healing joints in the world, she had to stumble bleeding into mine"

Excellent work. Exceptionally well done. Let's keep this rolling along please.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 11:52 pm
  

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Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2003 3:37 pm
Posts: 13082
Location: Missouri
a few historical ones:
Clark Stanley's Snake Oil Liniment - a rub used to reduce pain/swelling. (made of mineral oil, 1% fatty oil (presumed to be beef fat), red pepper, turpentine, camphor.) - was the medicine that gave the whole "fake medicine" biz it's name. however the 'snake oil' actually worked.. it's bad rep was people thinking the thing was actually made from snakes, because that was what the sellers/maker advertised it as using. (specifically 'chinese water snake')

Laudanum. actually more of an ingredient, used in a lot of medical elixirs of dubious use. it's basically powdered opium mixed into Alcohol. in terms of actual medical use, it served as a pain killer.. but was highly addictive.

one common element in many such 'medicines' is the use of alcohol.. sometimes drinking quality, but often dangerous grain alcohol (usually as the result of using low quality homebrew booze). alcohol allowed them to dissolve lots of things into their mixtures that wouldn't mix with water (like turpentine and other oils, for example, which was another popular addition), and it helped the stuff stay 'good' longer. since pretty much everyone drank back then because of the quality of water at the time, this was not really noticed.

some such 'medicines' actually used herbs and such with actual medicinal benefit.. they just tended to use them in ways that either didn't add much benefit.. or did provide benefit, but not as much as the maker's believed. (contrary to belief today, most of these people actually thought they had come up with very capable medicine.) they also used a lot of other stuff that had no real medicinal value.. but was believed to have some at the time. (including a lot of stuff that was actually toxic/poison.. though few successful ones used that stuff in large enough quantities to be immediately harmful. stuff like mercury, lead, hemlock, etc was not uncommon however)

it is also worth noting that some of this stuff, known today as 'patent medicine' to separate it from it's less helpful cousins (both were usually called 'patent medicine' at the time.. even if said maker hadn't actually taken out a patent on it) survived to modern times.. Bayer aspirin for example is an old patent medicine that proved to not only work, but be very successful.

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* Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:06 am
  

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Interesting lesson. Now how about whipping something up for us?

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Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 2:05 pm
  

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>This is RAW and Unedited. I will try to polish it up later I"m putting it >here now so I don't forget about it later.

Name: Komodo Jim’s Growth Elixir by Bill Coffin

Tagline/slogan: Why be a snake, when you can be a dragon?

Ingredients: Proprietary. Komodo Jim didn’t pound dirt all the way from Perth just to tell you how to make his elixir, bub. Now, are you gonna buy something, or what?

How it is prepared. Used and applied: What did I just say? Can’t you read?

Effects: Any reptilian character who ingests two shot glasses of these dubious-looking beverage (is that motor oil I see sickening the top?) will notice that their tail will grow another 6 to 12 inches over the next 24 hours. Reptilian characters who have lost their tail will see it begin to grow back. Non-reptilian characters with a tail will see their tail grow, also, but will be subject to side effects. (See below)

Duration: Tail elongation will last for three days after ingestion. Repeated ingestions will maintain tail growth. Overdosing on the Elixir will cause gigantism in the tail, but will also cause side effects. (See below)

Side effects (if any): Non-reptilians who take the elixir will see their tails grow, but they will suffer random hair loss and a serious scaliness to their skin. In extreme cases, permanent bifurcation of the tongue has been known to occur. Reptilians who overdose on the elixir will run a 5% cumulative chance of their tail falling off entirely and NEVER growing back once the primary effects of the elixir have ceased.

Duration: Tail loss is permanent. Tongue bifurcation is permanent. But hey, the ladies love a man with a huge tail, so some risks are worth taking, am I right?

Suggested retail/barter price: Can you really put a price on a magnificent tail? Actually you can. That’ll be Ten simoleons per dose, but because I like you, I can give you a whole bottle for a hunnert.

>Hahahahaha!. I like the strong arm/don't ask questions sales technique. >Now if we could give them wings and horns / breath weapon we could >sell it as a dragon six pack.

For fire-breathing, Komodo Jim has some really wiched hooch he'll sell you that goes for twenny a handle. After a few slugs of that, your breath will easily ignite over a lit flame.


Empire News at 10 Dragons attack an EoH FOB! It seems that a group of school aged mutant childred got all tweaked out on drugs and decided to attack our camp as "dragons". While some had horns, some flew, and some spit fire, all of them had simply glorious tails. They caused quite a bit of collateral damage and casualties were mounting high before we figure out what we were dealing with.."Weren't no dragons just a bunch of dirty mutant kids, 'cept this batch had a little more **** in their porridge, Made 'em mad, real mad. Not to worry though, they were quickly subdued. They'll be sent to our most secure facility to receive the medical treatment they deserve.." - Sgt. Orestes Tatulus
-Next Up the Technoville Titans ball Club takes on the New Kennel Howlers.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 2:42 pm
  

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Name: Syrup of Epic Cat
Tagline/slogan: Night vision, enhanced senses, amazing reflexes, preternatural hunting skill! Become Epic Cat!
Ingredients: Cat whiskers, 198 proof alcohol, cattail pod milk, cat mint, chinese cat powder, tomcat clover, pussy-willow, tiger lilly, Psilocybin mushrooms, Mescaline, Datura, dimethyltryptamine crystals, and lots of sugar.
How it is prepared. Used and applied: The ingredients mixed together and reduced over a fire of dried diviners sage (salvia divinorum) until it has reached a syrupy consistency by a "medicine man" who chants a litany of cat noises (meows, purrs, hisses, fftt's) When sufficiently heated and reduced the "syrup" is drank.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): Good lord no! It does not produce the advertised effects at all. It is mildly to highly toxic (roll to save vs poison reduce target number to 1/2) and extremely hallucinogenic (save vs illusion reduce target save to 1/4 [don't have the book in front of me to know what the numbers are]). If the save vs illusion fails victim will believe they have been granted the powers of a cat and behave (to the amusement of others and their own peril) as such. If the save vs poison fails the victim is wracked with terrible pain, violent convulsions, and profuse sweating. Actions are reduced to 1 attack with no combat bonuses. Skills are at - 60%.
Duration: Hallucinations last for 1d6 hours.
Side effects (if any): You could very well die from poisoning or thinking you have cat powers when you don't. Memory loss for 2x duration of hallucination or 2d4 hours if save vs hallucination is made.
Side effect duration: Death is pretty much permanent. (if anyone has a good idea on how long the effects of the failed save vs poison should last, feel free to drop some knowledge on me).
Suggested retail/barter price: 30 bucks per dose or an object/service of equal value.

*why would anyone use this stuff? Some think that it actually works and that being an Epic Cat is the edge they need. Those that survive the experience don't remember it not really working.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 8:34 pm
  

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The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Name: Syrup of Epic Cat
Side effects (if any): You could very well die from poisoning or thinking you have cat powers when you don't. .[/i]


Yeah, but you can die eight times before you really have to worry. :P

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:07 pm
  

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Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2003 3:37 pm
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Location: Missouri
Name: impulso
Tagline/slogan: "one gulp will make you faster, stronger, better"
Ingredients: officially secret (actually alcohol, Yerba extract, Ephedra sinica extract, Amanita Muscaria extract coloring)
How it is prepared. Used and applied: sold in small 4 dose glass bottles, is a dark red liquid. must be ingested.
Effects (what does it do? Does it even work at all?!): it does have some big effects. one dose will make you less tired, give you lots of energy, and make you feel a lot stronger, faster, and tougher.
Duration: 1D4+3 hours.
Side effects (if any): basically a mix of amphetamines and caffeine, the user will crash hard after the dose wears off. it is also habit forming if used too often. this is a known side effect. less well known is the hallucinations it can cause. if a whole bottle is drank at once, a non-lethal overdose will occur.
Side effect duration: hallucinations 1D4 hours.
Suggested retail/barter price: 10 bucks a bottle. (if purchased in the Pregunta, price is roughly equivalent to 3 bucks a bottle, suggesting the source might be found somewhere in the mexican nations the pregunta has ties too)

_________________
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70)
Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project)
Image
* All fantasy should have a solid base in reality.
* Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter.

-Max Beerbohm
Visit my Website


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 10:56 am
  

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taalismn wrote:
The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Name: Syrup of Epic Cat
Side effects (if any): You could very well die from poisoning or thinking you have cat powers when you don't. .[/i]


Yeah, but you can die eight times before you really have to worry. :P


I lol'ed. If you can figure out how to work that into the effects / side effects I'll add it!

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 11:15 am
  

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glitterboy2098 wrote:
Name: impulso
Tagline/slogan: "one gulp will make you faster, stronger, better"

Suggested retail/barter price: 10 bucks a bottle. (if purchased in the Pregunta, price is roughly equivalent to 3 bucks a bottle, suggesting the source might be found somewhere in the mexican nations the pregunta has ties too)


I now have visions of Speedy Gonzales taking a shot before he does his thing. Good stuff GB

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 12:58 pm
  

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Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2003 3:37 pm
Posts: 13082
Location: Missouri
the location was dictated by the ingredient list.. the only place that Yerba, Ephedra, and fly agaric all grow in the same region is central america.

it started on the idea of 'a beserker in a bottle', and sorta evolved into an energy drink that gets you tripped out on shrooms by accident..

_________________
Author of Rifts: Deep Frontier (Rifter 70)
Author of Rifts:Scandinavia (current project)
Image
* All fantasy should have a solid base in reality.
* Good sense about trivialities is better than nonsense about things that matter.

-Max Beerbohm
Visit my Website


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 5:05 pm
  

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Good deal man. Berserker in a bottle sounds like a heck of a concept. Scarcity of the ingredients raises the prices for providers/customers who are not in the area. I like the way you thought all of this out good job man

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 9:18 pm
  

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Doctor Bugalof's Bug-Be-Gon
Name: Doctor Bugalof's Bug-Be-Gon
Tagline/slogan: "Bugga-be-offa!"
Ingredients: Wynaro White Ginger, Chiangian Blue Pepper extract, black pepper, and flat ginger ale.
Preparation and Application: A bottled drink with a color and flavor similar to Doctor Pepper, at least initially, followed by a sudden burning sensation and taste like burnt rubber that persists in the mouth.
Effects:75% change of keeping insects away from the drinker, and any insects/parasites(non-magical) that DO bite the person suddenly swell up and explode.
Duration: 1d8 hours
Side effects (if any): The drinker's tastebuds are effectively burnt out for 2d4 hours, and the popping of insects and other parasites may adversely affect stealth. Symbiotes and bonded parasitic (magic)organisms find their abilities/effects mitigated by HALF for the duration.
Duration: 2d4 hours
Suggested retail/barter price: 35 credits a 16 fluid oz. bottle(good for 6 applications)

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 11:58 pm
  

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Location: West Central region of Indiana
Taal,
What happens if the user were to belch/spit on an insect? Your priced in credits so I'm thinking Rifts? What effect does this have against Xitixick(sp).

Both my chars are in an AtB2 setting. How effective is this stuff against the giant sized mutant insects that plague that setting?

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Sun Nov 23, 2014 2:49 pm
  

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The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
Taal,
What happens if the user were to belch/spit on an insect? Your priced in credits so I'm thinking Rifts? What effect does this have against Xitixick(sp).

Both my chars are in an AtB2 setting. How effective is this stuff against the giant sized mutant insects that plague that setting?



In order:
50% chance of the insect in question checking ITSELF into a roach motel, 50% chance of it taking its own life.
Xiticix count as supernaturals; save versus non-lethal poison or they go fleeing.

As for mutant insects? Save versus lethal poison or bug off, avoiding the person altogether.

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sun Nov 23, 2014 11:58 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:

As for mutant insects? Save versus lethal poison or bug off, avoiding the person altogether.


so if the mutant beetle, which is the size of a volkswagen bus decides to bite my character and tails the save versus poison does it explode? That could be a bad thing, (I would really love to see that happen!) that's a lot of shrapnel (AR 14) and guts to be blowing all over everywhere.

_________________
Look upon me and tremble ye masses. For I am The Necroposter!
keir451 wrote:
Amazing Nate; Thanks for your support!

Razzinold wrote:
And the award for best witty retort to someone reporting a minor vehicular collision goes to:
The Oh So Amazing Nate!

Nate, you sir win the internet for today! You've definitely earned the "oh so amazing" part of your name today. :lol:


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Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 7:46 pm
  

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Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
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The Oh So Amazing Nate wrote:
taalismn wrote:

As for mutant insects? Save versus lethal poison or bug off, avoiding the person altogether.


so if the mutant beetle, which is the size of a volkswagen bus decides to bite my character and tails the save versus poison does it explode? That could be a bad thing, (I would really love to see that happen!) that's a lot of shrapnel (AR 14) and guts to be blowing all over everywhere.



No, it just runs away. Vamooses. Buggers off. Pulls a tactical withdrawl. Retreats with extreme prejudice. Avoids you like the plague. Gives you the brush-off. Moons you from increasing range....

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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